Pacers 112, Bobcats 102

Charlotte had a great chance to keep their playoff hopes alive on Saturday night, as they hosted the Indiana Imploders at home. Pacers fans must have sensed danger once they began having to clarify which strip club incident they were referring to on radio call-in shows. All the riff-raff are just about gone now though, and pretty soon this will be Danny Granger’s team. This is a good thing because not only is Granger a decent player, he’s been like that one normal guy they have each season on The Real World who spends most of the time just shaking his head at all the nut-cases around him. What’s amazing is, in the latest Dime magazine, Granger actually credits Steven Jackson of all people for showing him “how to deal with on-court and off-court stuff: how to deal with the money, family members, how to deal with different situations that come up.”—huh?? That can’t be right. He must have meant Steven Speilberg or something…or Steven Seagal…Hell, even Steven from the old Dell commercials would make more sense.

Maybe Ike Diogu will amount to something too, although at this point I’m not sure. First he was supposed to be the sleeper draft pick, then he was supposed to be the sleeper gem in the big trade with the Warriors, and now he’s just basically sleeping on the end of the bench, even with Jamaal Tinsley and Marquis Daniels not in the lineup (for god knows why). And holy cow, Troy Murphy and Mike Dunleavy have the exact same haircut. Remember at the beginning of the season when these guys looked nothing alike on Golden State? Murphy had long hair and that mask invented by Rip Hamilton, while Dunleavy had long hair and that thong headband invented by Mike Miller. I wonder which one of them is pulling the “Single White Female” on the other?

Anyhow, the first half was uglier than Tyronne Lue. Emeka Okafor only played about five minutes, as he picked up three personals and then got called for a technical. I sure hope it wasn’t for telling referee Ken Mauer that a circa 1986 Pat Riley called and wants his hairstyle back, because that would be unprofessional. Just once, I’d like Primoz Brezec to act unsurprised when he gets the ball. Even when he jumps for a rebound and gets it, he ends up fumbling it out of bounds—c’mon Primoz, act like you’ve been there before. If not for Gerald Wallace’s usual studliness (29 points, 9 boards, 5 steals), Raymond Felton actually finishing a couple of those 1-on-3 kamikaze drives to the hoop (that are usually about as successful as shooting dice), we would have been down by a lot instead of up 3.

In the second half, both teams went on a rare and totally inexplicable run of decent shooting, but you could feel the Pacers beginning to take over. There were a bunch of bad signs: Granger, after not only getting the ball stolen by Wallace, but also getting pimp-slapped for good measure (payback for opening night, perhaps?), didn’t get mad, he got hot, hitting just about everything he shot (11/14 from the field, 7/7 from the line for 32 points). Then Darrell Armstrong joined in (16 points off the bench), and then…Keith McLeod? 11 points and 5 assists? Are you McKidding? Where did he come from?

This would have been a good night to have Matt Carroll explode, but it didn’t happen. Where’s Matt been lately? You know how many points he had last game? I’ll give you a hint: it’s the same number as Agent Arenas’s call sign. He was marginally better tonight (6 points), but the team in general flamed out at the end. What a hideous loss to a backwards team. Ugh, I’m going to hear Pacers color commentator Clark Kellogg laughing at the final buzzer like Vincent Price in my nightmares tonight, I just know it. Crap, no basketball postseason to care about…the Yankees are looking like garbage…It’s gonna be a cruel, cruel summer.